Good Grief

Grief  "Lupeó" translated in english from the Greek is heaviness, sorrow, and pain.

And grief can lead to repentance with salvation.

There is grief that is caused by others and then there is self-inflicted grief caused by sin.

2 Corinthians 7:9-11

I now rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because your grief led to repentance.

⁹For you were grieved as God willed.  God “wills” grief for a time. And its purpose is to lead us to repentance.

⁹…so that you didn’t experience any loss from us. The grief suffered by Corinth did not cause loss but actually caused gain- what was gained?  The “Good” Godly grief that produces a repentance that leads to salvation.

¹⁰ For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret,

Is there a salvation with regret? 

Have you ever missed the bogus “good” old days of sin? Satan tempts you and your flesh replies with cravings.  He remind us of the times when we were out in the world, and we thought we were having so much fun. This is dangerous territory to be in.  Galatians 5:1 For freedom, Christ set us free.  Stand firm, then, and don’t submit again to a yoke of slavery.  If you glorify the sinful days, you run the risk of returning to Egypt.  Back into slavery of the sin that dominated you to begin with.  It’s funny how we can forget so quickly the pains of being bound by the consequences of this sinful world.  1 Peter 4:1-4 Therefore, since Christ suffered in the flesh, arm yourselves also with the same understanding—because the one who suffers in the flesh is finished with sin— ² in order to live the remaining time in the flesh no longer for human desires, but for God’s will. ³ For there has already been enough time spent in doing what the Gentiles choose to do: carrying on in unrestrained behavior, evil desires, drunkenness, orgies, carousing, and lawless idolatry. ⁴ They are surprised that you don’t join them in the same flood of wild living—and they slander you.

The Israelites complained all the time and wanted to go back to Egypt (Exodus 16:2-3, Exodus 17:3).  Logically, that doesn’t make sense.  But man, our flesh is weird sometimes. Instead of just trusting God, they would go back to the horrible conditions of being enslaved?  When we look back at those days of debauchery with fondness, it is the same thing the Israelites did in the wilderness. And that probably kept them in the wilderness longer.  And with that sentimentality of the sinful past, that generation didn’t even make it to the promised land.  Be careful when you start to glorify the past, because you may end up staying in the wilderness.

Ephesians 4:22 to take off your former way of life, the old self that is corrupted by deceitful desires, ²³ to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, ²⁴ and to put on the new self, the one created according to God’s likeness in righteousness and purity of the truth.

(2 Corinthians cont.)…¹⁰but worldly grief produces death. 

Worldly grief that produces death is, thoughts like “I shouldn’t have said that”, or “Why did I do that?” And then we launch into every kind of excuse as to why we did what we should not have done.  We try and justify our actions. Or even worse, we do it over and over again.

Worldly Grief allows you to feel like we get away with sin for a while.  If we continue to speed when driving, we will eventually get caught.  If you have been drinking and we somehow get home alive, eventually you will be caught or even worse.  If you continue to sin in this way it always catches up to you. There are always consequences even if you don't feel them at first.

Romans 6:23 For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

¹¹ For consider how much diligence this very thing—this grieving as God wills—has produced in you: what a desire to clear yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what deep longing, what zeal, what justice! In every way you showed yourselves to be pure in this matter. 

Godly grief is, “ I shouldn’t have said that, I apologize to you and to God for what I said and I make a concerted effort to not do that again. Help me by your holy spirit to learn from this mistake.

“Why did I do that?”  Lord I sinned against you and I don’t want to ever do that again. I repent. Lord help me to learn from this experience and do the right thing next time the moment presents itself. Help me by your spirit to learn from this experience.

Godly grief is when you realize you have sinned against God or against someone and you feel the Holy Spirit convict you.  This kind of grief brings you back to God with repentance. 

Does this grief you are in leave you turning to God or turning away?  It is God’s will we grieve when we miss the mark.

John 14:26 But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and remind you of everything I have told you.

2Timothy 2: 24-26 The Lord’s servant must not quarrel, but must be gentle to everyone, able to teach, and patient, ²⁵ instructing his opponents with gentleness. Perhaps God will grant them repentance leading them to the knowledge of the truth. ²⁶ Then they may come to their senses and escape the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will.

What about grief that was caused by others?

In my opinion, the grief Paul is describing could be self-inflicted or caused by others.  The word pain in 2 Corinthians 2:2 is translated as a form of the same word in the Greek as “grief.” It uses the word Lupeó which is the same word but different form to describe the pain Paul caused the Corinth church on the last visit he was there.

2 Corinthians 2:1-2    In fact, I made up my mind about this: I would not come to you on another painful (grievous) visit. ² For if I cause you pain (grief), then who will cheer me other than the one being hurt by me? 

So…What grief lead to my repentance? 

When I got saved, repented for the first time, I guess my grief was my childhood.  The pain in my heart that my parents neglected me. The lack of overall safety and the abuse. The instability of my life. The shame, and overall feelings of not feeling truly loved, accepted, cherished.  This was my grief. My heaviness, my sorrow, and pain. This grief didn’t mean I sinned.  The childhood I endured wasn’t my fault and yet this grief led me to repentance.

¹¹ For consider how much diligence this very thing—this grieving as God wills—has produced in you: what a desire to clear yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what deep longing, what zeal, what justice! In every way you showed yourselves to be pure in this matter. 

“grieving as God wills”- that is a hard thing to wrap my head around.  God allowed me to have a bad childhood.  An unsafe childhood.  He willed it.  Did he want that to happen?  No.  But we live in a fallen world and we are all at one point or another collateral damage. He took the damage I endured and created a bridge for me to cross into eternal life.  I will live forever in his presence. Here on earth and until eternity.

Psalm 30:11 You have  turned for me my mourning into dancing.  You removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy.

Psalm 90:14-15 Satisfy us in the morning with your faithful love so that we may shout with joy and be glad all our days. ¹⁵ Make us rejoice for as many days as you have humbled us,

Psalm 71:20-21 You caused me to experience many troubles and misfortunes,
but you will revive me again. You will bring me up again, even from the depths of the earth. ²¹ You will increase my honor and comfort me once again.

There is no regret with godly grief because of the final result. Whether it is grief caused but others or self-inflicted grief. If the final result is repentance, then we can be sure this is good grief.