This is my Testimony

I was 17 when I had an encounter with Jesus at Christian Faith Center, of Hearne Texas.  Pastor Don Thomas and Associate Pastor Ruben Canales.  Pastor Canales was my best friend’s dad.  This precious family picked me up and drove 25 minutes every Sunday to church.  He had 4 children and some how we squeezed all of us in the maroon and silver 5^th avenue four door. 

The first time I went into the church and the service began, I knew I would never be the same again.  I cried and cried feeling the Holy Spirit all over that building.  I wasn’t sad or happy, just all these emotions came flooding out.  It felt like I cried for a long time. It felt like I didn’t realize I was lost, but boy was I glad that He found me.  I came to the front and gave my life to Christ right then. 

I met my now husband and we of course, like stupid kids, got in over our heads and I became pregnant at 19.  We moved in together and had a beautiful baby boy, Jonathan.  After trying to live on our own, which didn’t last very long, we had to move into Ross’s parents house. About that same time, Pastor Ruben started Brazos Miracle Outreach.  And we grew up in that church for the next 17 years. I was raised in that church. I raise my children in that church.  Once Pastor retired, the church was closed and we just stopped going to church.  I prayed, worried a lot.  But my focus was just not on Jesus.  I was distracted with life. After 6 years of many trials and tribulations, in November 2024, I decided enough was enough.  I was tired of being knocked around by life and circumstances and needed to start looking for a church community.  While looking I started a bible study by Beth Moore and that kicked things off for me in the right direction. Ross and I started to actively look for a new chuch in January 2025. During that time, I  began to have this incredible hunger for the word of God.  I couldn’t get enough.  I was reading, searching, watching ministers on youtube.  I could not get enough of Jesus.  On Easter Sunday 2025 we were invited by a neighbor and started to attend Grace-Midtown. We have found a church family and blessed beyond everything to serve and be a part of the body of Christ.

You know, I’ve always loved Jesus.  I have vivid memory of kneeling at my bed and praying to Jesus, “Now I lay me down to sleep…”  I didn’t know what it really meant but I prayed it every night.  I recall the smell of the first Sunday School class with the ½ doors.  I remember the large church with the highest ceilings and I swear if you blindfolded me and walked me in there I could remember it by just the smell.  We occasionally went to church.  Every time I was in that building , it was such a refuge.  I felt the holy spirit and his comfort even then  but I didn’t understand.  I just knew it was a safe place. 

Life at home was an entirely different vibe. I had alcoholic parents and was sexually abused by my step father from age 4 to 11.  I had a brother I knew I had to protect but he to was hurt in many ways by our parent's failures.  My mother and step father got a divorce and despite the severe dysfunction already present in that family, the divorce through us for a bigger loop then we were use to.  My step dad was the only father I knew.  My bio dad was non-existent. I have been kidnapped 3 times in my life by my mom, dad and grandparents. That is a story for a later day.  I basically grew up taking care of my mom and brother and occasionally my drunk step-dad.  I was the responsible party for 2 grown adults and a little brother 4 years younger then me.  So as you can imagine, I have had control issues, abandonment issues, major shame issues, self hate, and of course lived in this constant state of fear in my chest. I finally moved in with my grandparents in 6^th grade and well, at least the fear in my chest went away…  All the rest stayed at the forefront of my psyche for most of my adolscence and teenage years.  When I met Ross I was just so happy that someone loved me.  He had his issues with addicition too.  But, at least he loved me.  We met at a small church in a small town. He was 21 and I was 17.  Obviously too young but we did both get saved in that little church and well, made a lot of mistakes.  But through everything, somehow God kept us together.  I never thought leaving was an option.  Despite the deep misery I was in.  We have had many years of healing and continue to heal from the childhood traumas of the past. 

My sole purpose for this blog is to share what I am learning with my walk with Christ.  I cannot contain this love and peace I feel and see inside and have to share it with someone.  I am actively growing and learning and I am going to be wrong sometimes, probably a lot of times.  But sometimes I’m going to be right too.  I know the Holy Spirit is in me.  I am open to what Jesus wants to share with me and because I have a heart to see others grow and heal, I have to share what I learn.  I’m open to feedback but not attacks.  I am working out my salvation and want to share with others that process in the hopes it encourages someone else to work out their salvation.  The word is living and breathing for me and it quenches a thirst in my soul that I didn’t realize how thirsty I really was. I hope my short stories and observations of what I’m learning will bless you but mostly encourage you to look for yourself and see how good His word is. The word of God transforms, it soothes, it opens your mind to something new and different.  There is absolutely nothing like an “A-ha” moment with Jesus.  I am obsessed with knowing and understanding on a deep level how to best serve Jesus.  Being open to what he wants to share with me.  And how I can share it with others. I want to share with friends and family and anyone else out there looking for an “A-ha!” moment.